If you’ve been following along over the past few weeks, you’ve probably noticed that I’ve shared a little more of my heart than I have in a long time.
After years of walking through unimaginable loss, I’ve begun sharing pieces of a new chapter—one that includes healing, hope, and yes… someone very special named Raymond.
Since then, my inbox has been filled with hundreds of messages.
Some have simply said…
“I’m so happy for you.”
Others have shared stories of losing a spouse, navigating divorce, or wondering if they’ll ever smile again.
And then there have been the questions.
So many thoughtful, heartfelt questions.
Questions about Raymond.
Questions about my children.
Questions about Quintin.
Questions about grief.
Questions about faith.
Questions about moving forward without feeling like you’re leaving someone behind. Which is something I have wrestled with for the last few years since the passing of Q. I actually wrote more on this and about not turning back, HERE – on a blog named Don't Turn Back- God is Doing a New Thing.
As I sat reading message after message, something unexpected happened.
I realized these weren’t really questions about my life.
They were questions about yours.
Because behind almost every question was a deeper one…
“Could God do this for me too?”
Could He heal my broken heart?
Could I ever trust again?
Could I ever laugh again without feeling guilty?
Would my children be okay?
Is there really life after losing someone you thought you’d spend forever with?
Those are the questions that matter.
And those are the questions I want to answer.
Not because I have all the answers…
But because I’ve learned that God often uses ordinary stories to remind us that He’s still writing beautiful ones.
Many of you want to know, is it really possible for God to write a new Chapter after a devastating loss and I am here to YES YES He can…if you want to read more of my heart on this check out my blog: Can God Write Another Chapter After Devastating Loss? Finding Hope and Love Again After Losing My Husband
Why I’m Not Answering Everything Today
I’ve thought about writing one giant Q&A post.
But honestly…
That wouldn’t honor these conversations.
Some of these questions deserve more than a paragraph.
Some deserve tears.
Some deserve laughter.
Some deserve Scripture.
And some deserve the full story.
So instead of rushing through them, I’m inviting you to walk with me.
Over the next several weeks, I’ll be sharing a new blog in this series, answering the questions you’ve asked most often—not just with quick answers, but with the stories behind them.
Because sometimes the story is where God teaches us the most.
Here’s What’s Coming
Over the next few weeks, we’ll talk about questions like:
- What did my kids really think when I started dating again?
- How did I know I was ready?
- Did I feel guilty holding someone else’s hand?
- How do I still honor Quintin while embracing a new chapter?
- How did I meet Raymond?
- What made him different?
- What role did faith play in every step of this journey?
- How do you trust God with a future you never planned?
Some of these blogs may make you smile.
Some may make you cry.
And if I’m being honest…
I’ll probably do both while writing them.
This Series Isn’t About Dating
If you’ve followed Crazy Busy Mama for any length of time, you know this has never been about finding another relationship.
It’s always been about finding Jesus in every season.
This next chapter isn’t replacing the last one.
It’s proof that God is still faithful after it.
I will always love Quintin.
I will always honor the life we built together.
And I also believe with my whole heart that healing doesn’t dishonor the people we’ve lost.
It honors the God who carried us through the loss.
If sharing my story helps even one person believe that their own story isn’t over, then every vulnerable word will be worth it.
Let’s Walk This Journey Together
My prayer is that this series becomes more than a collection of blog posts.
I hope it becomes a place where we can have honest conversations about grief, healing, faith, family, and the unexpected ways God writes new chapters.
As I answer your questions, I also want to honor an important boundary.
Many of you have asked about my children—how they felt, what they said, and how they’re navigating this season. While I will absolutely share my perspective as their mom and what this journey has been like for me, the details of their individual stories belong to them.
They each have their own voice, their own experiences, and one day, if they choose to share those stories, that decision will be theirs—not mine.
One of the greatest ways I can love my children is by protecting what isn’t mine to tell.
So throughout this series, I’ll always share my heart, my journey, and what God has taught me, while honoring the privacy of the people I love most.
Now I’d love to hear from you.
What questions do you have?
Is there a topic you’d like me to write about? Is there something you’ve wondered but haven’t seen me answer yet?
Leave your questions in the comments below. I’ll be reading every one, and your question may inspire an upcoming Coffee Chat or become the next blog in this series.
Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this:
The questions we’re sometimes afraid to ask are often the very ones someone else needs answered.
Thank you for being here, for extending grace, and for allowing me to share this journey with you.
With love,
Lori ❤️
What question would you like me to answer next? Leave it in the comments below. I’d love for this series to be shaped not just by my story, but by the conversations that matter most to you.
Hi Lori, I have been following you for a while now; your writing is so touching and well executed! I lost my husband of 42½ years in March 2023 after a 6-month battle with pancreatic cancer ♋️ He was 64. It was heart-wrenching to hear his medical team say “there is nothing more we can do.” I have three married daughters who love Jesus, as do their amazing husbands. They have blessed me with six beautiful granddaughters, whose ages now are 18 down to (almost) 5. I am now 69, and my struggles are with missing the “what could have beens?” What would our retirement have looked like? Where would we have traveled together? We don’t get to share the graduations, weddings, and babies of our granddaughters together. I feel like he missed so much, yet that feeling partners in tension with knowing he is fully healed and whole with Jesus! Mixed emotions are hard! Some days I am content, some days I am ambushed with grief! Thank you for sharing your journey with us; I wish you every blessing as the Lord reveals what’s ahead for you and Raymond!
Is Raymond a widower as well? You two look so happy with one another and I am so very happy for you. I have not lost a husband, but I did lose my daughter 10 years ago this year. It has been the hardest thing to ever have to go thru. I remember the first time I actually laughed after my daughter passed and I felt extremely guilty. Someone told me that she was smiling down on me and saying, Mom, it’s okay, I want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy Lori and I can see happiness on your face for the first time in 2 years. God bless you and thank you for sharing your life and journey!
Jackie, first, I am so incredibly sorry for the loss of your daughter. ❤️ I can only imagine how much you still carry her with you, even 10 years later. What you shared about laughing for the first time and then feeling guilty really touched me because I understand that guilt that can come with feeling joy again. I’m learning that happiness doesn’t mean we loved them any less or that we’ve left them behind.
And to answer your question, no, Raymond is not a widower. He has been incredibly respectful of my story with Q and understands that loving Q will always be part of who I am. Thank you for saying you can see happiness on my face again. 🥹 That means so much to me. God bless you, Jackie. ❤️🙏
Lori. I’ve been your cheerleader. I don’t think you’ve rushed anything. and I don’t think you should live your entire life depressed and in such sadness you can barely get out of bed. that’s not helping your children witness a strong faith believing mother. plus if you did fall apart have a nervous breakdown your children would feel 100x more burden. and the outcome wouldn’t change. nothing you could have done could have changed this. my question is..as I’ve been single 20 years..I don’t trust men. I don’t believe anything they say online to get me on that date. I think they’re going to say what I want. be that great guy. all the things. I’ve had this in a second marriage. then once he got me. married me. slowly it changed. he wasn’t that guy anymore. how do you even get beyond that in this world of so much deceit. I always think. if he’s so great why is he on there. not speaking of Raymond Raymond speaking of he as in a general sense. maybe it’s me who’s broken by men. you had a good one..you’ve never experienced the world out there. he looks great you both look happy.
Shelley, this is such an honest question, and I actually understand it more than you might think. ❤️ I don’t believe trust means blindly believing everything someone tells you—and I don’t think dating requires us to do that either.
For me, I’m learning to let time reveal character. Do his actions consistently match his words? How does he respond when things are difficult, not just when everything is fun and new? How does he treat his family, my children, other people, and me when no one is watching? And most importantly, I pray about it and ask God for discernment.
I don’t have some guarantee about how any relationship will turn out. None of us do. I’m simply trying to stay present, keep my eyes open, not rush ahead of what I actually know, and trust God more than I trust my own plans.
And Shelley, after what you’ve experienced, I can understand why trusting someone again would feel incredibly hard. Give yourself grace with that. ❤️ Thank you for always cheering me on and for asking such a real question.
Hi Lori , I’m so happy that you are finding joy again. I too lost my husband in August 2024 very unexpectedly. As the 2 year mark comes I still feel guilty laughing. One of my daughters and family just moved in with me and I can say it’s been good. I feel like I can breathe again. I’m close to 60 and feel like I’m content. We had 31 good years and I’m starting to feel some of my joy again. Prayers to you
Melinda, thank you for opening your heart. ❤️ I know that feeling of guilt all too well, and I think so many widows do. But I also believe our spouses would want us to truly live again. I’m so thankful you’re beginning to feel your joy returning after 31 beautiful years together. I’m praying this next chapter continues to bring you peace and hope. Thank you for walking this journey with me.
Hi Lori, I am really happy that you are able to let God guide you to where he wants you to be and he has opened the door for you to find someone to share it with. I’m thankful that you are writing this blog and sharing your journey. It really is helpful to see and read how so many people are dealing with their own journeys with God and also with deep loss. I lost my husband about two and a half years ago. I also have been looking for my purpose from God since he has been gone. When you lose your significant other, best friend, love of your life that you’ve been with for more than half of your life, there truly is tremendous grief and it has been quite the journey to try to figure out how to move forward with my life. I ask God for direction everyday. If he should decide to open that door to allow me to find someone to share my future with, I am truly open to that thought. I guess my question is – if you decide you would like to meet others that would be open for friendship and perhaps more, where do you look? Thank you for continuing to be so open and honest and sharing your journey. It truly is uplifting and encouraging.
Janice, thank you so much for sharing your heart with me. ❤️ First, I’m so sorry for the loss of your husband. I know how overwhelming it can feel to wonder what your purpose is after losing the person you planned to spend your life with.
As for meeting someone, I honestly wasn’t looking. I spent a long season focusing on my relationship with God, healing, and my children. When I finally felt ready, I simply became open to whatever God had for my future.
Believe it or not, there’s actually a much bigger story behind how I ended up on Facebook Dating—and the funny thing is… I really wasn’t. 😊 I’ll be sharing that in an upcoming blog because it’s one of the questions I’ve been asked the most.
More than anything, I believe it was God’s timing that mattered. I prayed for discernment every step of the way and trusted Him to open and close the right doors.
Whether God has marriage, friendship, or something entirely different for your future, I truly believe He will make the next step clear as you continue seeking Him. One faithful step at a time. ❤️ Thank you for being here and for encouraging me.
Hi, I was wondering if you would consider moving once your kids are all out of the house? (College) You have good and bad memories in that house, but it is the house your kids have grown up in. God Bless
Oh how I needed this!!!! God is not a God of worry and anxiousness!!! But a God of peace and contentment! I am so happy for you and your new journey!!!
Tina, your comment made me smile. ❤️ Isn’t it amazing how God gives us exactly what we need at just the right time?
You’re so right—He is not a God of fear or anxiety but of peace. That doesn’t mean the journey is always easy, but it does mean we never have to walk it alone. Thank you for celebrating this new chapter with me and for pointing us all back to Him. God bless you! ❤️
Lori i am so happy for you that The Lord has brought someone into your life .A man who was longing for the same thing as you .And only a man to love and love you back could that be possible. Enjoy the journey.
Rebecca, thank you so much for your kind words. ❤️ I truly believe God writes stories we could never write ourselves. Raymond is a blessing, and we’re taking this journey one prayerful step at a time, trusting the Lord to lead us. Thank you for celebrating this season with us.
Lost my wife 17 months ago. I am currently 75 years old. Don’t think the only person that mattered to me more than anything else, could be replaced by anyone, if you truly loved that person. Where there was deep love, there is deep grief. Happy you can move on and do that.
Bruce, thank you for sharing your heart. ❤️ I’m so sorry for the loss of your wife.
I agree with what you said: where there has been deep love, there is deep grief. Loving again has never been about replacing the person we lost because that’s simply impossible. The love I have for Quintin will always be part of who I am.
For me, this new chapter is simply another reminder that God is still writing my story. Thank you for your kindness and encouragement. I’ll be praying for you as you continue to navigate your own journey. ❤️
Hi , Lori, I believe when you are young, as you are, your choices and time to make those choices are seemingly, boundless. My husband passed Aug 5, 2023. We had 56 years together. We married in early college. He had just turned 76. I was 75. I live in the midwest in a smaller town. I am now 78. I have grown children and grandchildren. I am a Christian too. Its different when you are older. I have less time and fewer choices.
Cathy, thank you so much for sharing your story with me. ❤️ Fifty-six years together is such a beautiful testimony of love. I can only imagine how deeply you miss him.
You’re right that our journeys look different because our seasons of life are different, but one thing remains the same—God is faithful in every season. Thank you for reminding me that every widow’s story is unique. I’m praying that the Lord continues to give you peace, purpose, and sweet reminders of His presence each day. Thank you for being here.
Today mark my husband 3rd anniversary. I like to know will I ever find myself again? I feel at times I don’t know who I am. I’m no longer Michael’s wife anymore. Who am I now and what’s my purpose?
Laura, my heart is with you today as you remember your husband. ❤️ Three years doesn’t erase a lifetime of love, and anniversaries can bring so many emotions.
I remember asking myself those same questions: “Who am I now?” and “What is my purpose?” One thing I’ve learned is that while grief changes us, it doesn’t end God’s purpose for us. Your identity has always been rooted in Christ—not just in being Michael’s wife.
Be gentle with yourself today. I’ll be praying that God continues to reveal His plans one step at a time and reminds you that your story isn’t over. ❤️
I’m curious about how You and Raymond met….I lost my Late Wife Cindy in December 2023 on her 70th birthday. She had suffered from a Terminal Dementia for years. we had 24 years together. I was in a terrible pit of despair after Cindy passed, I was considering joining her….and God told me to stop…and to reach out, my story wasn’t over. I joined an online dating app for seniors, and within a week I was driving out of state to met a wonderful Widow…two years later we’re engaged to be married. God definitely has a plan.
Steven, thank you for sharing your story. ❤️ First, I’m so sorry for the loss of Cindy. Twenty-four years together is a beautiful gift, and I know that kind of love leaves a deep ache when they’re gone.
I love hearing how God met you in your despair and faithfully guided your steps. Your story is such an encouragement that He truly does have a plan, even when we can’t see it.
And yes—I will absolutely be sharing the story of how Raymond and I met. It wasn’t something I was looking for, but it’s another chapter of God’s faithfulness, and I hope it encourages others who are wondering if hope is still possible. Thank you for taking the time to encourage me.
Hi Lori…As I also lost my husband from a sudden heart attack 2 years ago July 4, 2024, Its been horrific trying to heal from this..While I dont see myself being alone forever…thinking of this happening again terrifies me..what are your thoughts on that.!! By the way..yall are a beautiful couple!!
Kimberly, I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. ❤️ Sudden loss is incredibly traumatic, and I completely understand why the thought of loving again feels frightening.
For me, healing wasn’t about replacing the love I had—it was about allowing God to continue healing my heart one day at a time. There was never pressure to date again, and I truly believe there’s no “right” path except following God’s leading for your own life.
Whether God calls you to remain single or opens the door to love again someday, He will give you the peace you need for that season. One step at a time. ❤️
And thank you so much for your sweet compliment. That means a lot.