Q’s Last Valentine’s Day Love Letter

Qs last Valentine’s Day love letter to me ❤️‍… It is so honestly hard to write that sentence. It doesn't seem like it has been 10 months since I lost you. You have left a void in our lives that will never be filled. The grief is so indescribable! Quintin, you were our person! You were the love of my life and every day that passes without you in it, it doesn't even seem real.

Qs last Valentine’s Day love letter to me ❤️‍

Facebook memories are bittersweet! Some say social media is a waste, but I feel quite the opposite and honestly I am so incredibly grateful for it. Social media allows me to be able to see the priceless memories of my late husband and I have shared throughout the years. The memories that pop up of the amazing words my husband would share and the wisdom (which we later would call Q'sim's) he would share to others to offer insight through our mistakes. 

Marriage isn’t perfect friends… no relationship is. Quintin and I were married 6 weeks shy of celebrating our 25 marriage anniversary. Couples don't make it 25 years in marriage without a few bumps or roadblocks along the way.

Below is a picture of Quintin and I are on our honeymoon laying in the grass in Hawaii with not a care in the world. Little did we know what our lives were going to be or the titles we would one day wear, all we knew is in that moment we had it all. Oh what a wonderful amazing memory. But friends, love doesn't stay in the honeymoon phase of lovey dovey and honestly I am so glad it does not.

 

Relationships are messy sometimes and marriage is no doubt messy but your marriage is worth the work. When we enter marriage we bring lots of baggage into our marriage from our childhood and witnessing our parents marriage. Although there may be good lessons to learn through those experiences, there are often some undoing that needs to take place in order for your marriage to be a success. Quintin and I learned early on in our marriage our LOVE LANGUAGES through a newly wed class we took at church and looking back on our almost 25 years until the Lord called Quintin home, I believe this was a necessary foundation for a successful marriage. If you don't know what your love language is, your spouses or maybe you have never heard of that before you must take the LOVE LANGUAGE TEST HERE trust me it is a relationship must and will not only help you your marriage, other relationships even including your parenting.

Fight for one another, even when you don’t see eye to eye. Love one another when you don’t “feel” like it… because long after what you think “love” is, is truly where the real love begins. It's in the fight for one another that you grow a deeper connection, appreciation and loyalty to one another.

Love is an action…a sacrificial love! It's about putting your selfish desires away for the needs of someone else. It’s the endless dirty dishes, piles of laundry, sleepless nights, laying awake with worry about your kiddos, wondering if you made the right choice, trying to figure out how make ends meet when nothing seems to work, regretting the words that came out of your mouth in a moment of haste and the list goes on! 

Life is hard… But you get to do it together!  

Marriage is a beautiful journey of ups and downs and that’s the beauty of it! Lean into the hard. Love one another when it doesn’t make sense. Learn to laugh at yourself… Forgive with an endless amount of taking score and give grace in abundance! 

Most importantly learn to out serve one another! Love is a choice and an action … this Valentine’s Day might you show the love ❤️ you have for your spouse with no expectation in return – just because you love them. They didn’t have to do anything to earn it or repay it … just give in abundance. 

This is a fun picture of our first teenage dating year and our very first Valentine's year together in High School. Funny how pictures can bring back so many memories and emotions along with it. I remember this picture almost like yesterday. It's funny how I remember the almost perfect weather day, the photographer positioning us in such an awkward pose and we couldn't stop laughing. I can still hear him laugh making some sort of inappropriate yet perfectly imperfect time of a joke in true Q fashion! HA! He always knew how to make everyone gasp then break out in laughter. Gosh I miss you!

After rummaging around fond memories, I came across a facebook post from just last year 2024 which would mark out last Valentine's together making YOU my forever Valentine.

Here is Q’s last Valentine ? Letter to me which I will cherish forever. 

Quintin Writes…

Honestly-  we haven’t had a perfect marriage – Far from it in many ways.  Sometimes we plain ol’ sucked @ss at it.  Yep, how bout that FB valentines truth! ?

But you know what, we just keep on keepin’ on, commited to the plan.  His plan. 

Committed to making things work, despite the crap, and thankful for the times we get it right.  

I love and respect you more now than I ever have, thats real truth.  

I choose that love. 

You choose that love.

It’s not some BS emotion that comes and goes.  It’s a choice we make for Him, for each other, and for them. 

A great marriage is really just two flawed people who refuse to quit on each other.  

They grow roots in Christ’s truth ?

They don’t give up on each other

They make mistakes, forgive, grow, enjoy and prosper! 

Feb 14 is just another day around here, where I take pause and reflect with gratitude and humility, that we CHOSE love so many times when it would have seemed easy, or dare I say “justified”, not to. 

Because He first loved us, I choose to love you more and more every single day.  I know you do too. 

You are a wonderful woman who models Christ first, spouse second, family 3rd and everything else after that.  

Thank you for being amazing. Thank you for showing our children what true love looks like, what commitment looks like, and what it means to be centered on Christ, not the world. 

QC

You can find that SOCIAL POST HERE

Tears fill my eyes as I read this and type it up to share with you. My hopes in sharing this Love letter, is that it is not your typical love letter full of fluff but REAL STuff…where the REAL LOVE is found!

Don't be afraid of the hard, the work, the messy, the dirty, the imperfect. Get your hands dirty and learn to embrace it all! Christ first, spouse second, family third. It's a simple formula that produces profound results.

Life is an adventure friends….make sure you live it to the fullest! There is no redo…this is not a dress rehearsal this is the main show. Make every moment count!

You were my ADVENTURE Q…Life was just better with YOU! Miss you with every part of me …signed your FOREVER VALENTINE!

Daddy's Girl

To read about his challenge to girl dads to be that first and always Valentine to their girls READ HERE! It is such a profound message!

I will be wearing my XOXO THE ORIGINAL LOVE LETTER Crewneck proudly today on my first Valentine's Day without Q to remind me of whose I am, who originally loved me and who loves my husband more than I could ever imagine! It is John 15:13 that reminds me that our love story continues. Death does not have the victory because with HIM we have eternal hope of being reunited one day in glory in our forever home heaven! So thankful for the cross!

Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

John 15:13

We Love because He first LOVED us! 

1 John 4:19

Let us as parents be the example of that TRUE ORIGINAL LOVE that Christ Laid down His life for so that we could also love others like Christ loves us!

The crew neck is sold out, but you can still Grab your XOXO The Original Love Letter CBM exclusive Mug HERE as this reminder of HIS one true love for you!

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