Not gonna lieโฆ Fall is one of my favorite seasons but so far itโs been the hardest season yet since Qs passing ?????
I still canโt believe this is my new lifeโฆ ?
But I am reminded this morning that โAutumn is Gods way of showing us how beautiful change can be.โ
Change is inevitable โฆ some changes are easier to embrace than others. I am not sure I will ever be able to embrace this season, because I donโt have a desire to have a season without Q. Itโs such a weird thing, one I canโt quite explain. Honestly, if I think too much ahead I literally physically get sick.
I don't know if you fell on my Crazy Busy Mama blog because you are struggling with grief too, or just happened on this blog post because of my Crazy Busy Mama recipes blog, but either way I am glad you are here. I am knew to this grief struggle, as I lost my sweet husband unexpectedly on April 9th 2024. That day marks the day my entire world came crashing down. If you are new to this section of the Blog here is Quintin's Storyย and the events surrounding his sudden and unexpected death.
Continued…
So I am trusting ??? the process and leaning into Who makes all things beautiful in His timing ?
Itโs not the story I wantedโฆ or even one I like to share. Although, I am confused and sad I know God is still writing my story. I didnโt choose this story! However, DESPITE is ALL, I choose to get up and fight every day for healing for me and my kids โค๏ธโ? I pray for a fire โค๏ธโ?to burn in my heart for HIM to use me. I donโt know what that looks like and I am not sure I want to know too far outโฆ I just want to be willing to wake up in my emptiness with a hearts posture to be willing to be part of HIS story for me.
I can whine and cry about this NOT being the story I wantedโฆ and trust me there are days- but I have decided to stop trying to understand WHY ME and start moving into โWHAT NOWโ?
Are you in the depths of despair and wrapped up in frustration as the story you never wanted is unfolding right in front of your eyes?? ??
Ughโฆ itโs so incredibly difficult and painful!
What ifโฆ you change the looping narrative of โWHY MEโ to โWHAT NOWโ?
Stepping out in faithโฆ Action steps towards the unknown is incredibly hard ? the more I think the more I question and get trapped in FEAR and I am DONE with FEAR!
Are you also done with being the victim of your circumstances and being controlled by fear!?
If yesโฆ then
Take that first step with me join me in asking each morning โฆ โฌ๏ธโฌ๏ธโฌ๏ธ
Good morning Godโฆ what are you up to today, and how can I be a part of it?! It may very well be the courage that you need to take a step forward today.
He is Still Writing Your Story…
Remember, even in your depths of despair or this word full of confusion. He remains faithful.
He is still writing your story! ?โค๏ธโ?
These lyrics are Every thing and allows me to keep that eternal perspective.
โSometimes I fall to my knees and pray
Come Jesus come, let today be the day
Sometimes I feel like Iโm gonna break
But Iโm holding on to a hope that wonโt fade
Come Jesus come
Weโve been waiting so long
For the day You return to heal every hurt
And right every wrong
We need You right now
Come and turn this around
Deep down I know this world isnโt home
Come Jesus comeโ
Hold on my friend and start asking God each day โฆ How can I be part of your story?
I am excited to announce, I have started my very own Crazy Busy Mama mug collection. โAutumn is God's Way of Showing How Beautiful Change Can Beโ is on of my signature exclusive mugs and you canย SNAG IT HEREย โ Each one of my designs comes with my CBM signature with a ?โ๏ธ on each. I hope you enjoy having coffee with me each morning and these exclusive CBM designs encourage you to put your best foot forward each day!
Donโt know you personally, but ? you!
As always, I am thankful for your christlike example and your words of encouragement. I love your mugs and Iโve ordered a couple. As your one cup says, you are amazing you are chosen you are never alone you are victorious. You are capable, strong, and you are enough. Hugs of strength and love to you, Lori and your family.
One of your videos came up in my TikTok feed a couple weeks ago. I had never seen your blog or come across you prior to that. I do think God put you there for me. I lost my fiance Scott unexpectedly May 5, 2024. It has truly been absolutely devastating. We were together 10 years and engaged for a short 8 months. I cherish my time with him but am struggling with my new reality, a reality that some days I can’t hardly stand to face. When you said, “Honestly, if I think too much ahead I literally physically get sick.” I feel this very deeply. He was my best friend, my soulmate, my everything (next to my kids) and I struggle to figure out life without him to share it with. I wanted you to know that your postings are helping me, even if on the bad days, I want to tell everyone to go step on lego and let me be sad. ๐ Its just almost a relief to know that the grief I’m feeling is normal and that I’m not being dramatic. Its REAL. Very real. So, this lost soul thanks you.
This is totally me too dot Lori has helped me through my grief of 32 years of marriage. He was my rock. I miss him so much so thankful for her encouraging words and showing her true feelings through the tearsโฆ Which we all are sharing wowโฆ Who knew, it could be so painfulโฆ I also lost my daughter in November 1923 and my husband in February 1924 I recently tried acupunctureโฆ Letโs face it up to the point. Iโll try anything to lift this heaviness from my chest and for the tears to not be quite so close to the surface every Minute of every dayโฆ They do have a service with acupuncture for grief. I did it yesterday and I have to sayโฆ I do feel a little less heavy in n my chest โฆ. A little easier to breathe . Just thought Iโd share. Iโm so sorry for your grief and Loriโs grief and my daughter has helped me by sayingโฆ Next right thing Momโฆ we are going to do the next right thing !!!maybe that will help you tooโฆโค๏ธMarilyn Gist
You are so beautiful inside & out!!! Thank you for your inspiration & encouragement for us out here. Sending ? from Arkansas!!! CS
Thank you so much for sharing your story of loss and grief . I just lost my Mom on September 14 2024 , after a battle with dementia, I had taken care of her at home till 4 months ago. She was my best friend , and I feel lost without her .My Dad passed 4 years ago during COVID , I am divorced with an adult son , 28. He is not married , and no grandchildren ,I am so sad and lonely, I don’t want to face another day . I have no purpose, and I don’t want to volunteer somewhere . I dread cleaning out her house and 62 years of her things that were important to her .I get physically sick when I think ahead or about holidays .