Some mornings, anxiety beats me awake before my alarm ever does.
Before my feet hit the floor… my mind is already running.
Before the coffee finishes brewing… my chest already feels tight.
And at night, when the house finally quiets down, the worries don’t always follow suit.
Lately, anxiety feels louder than my coffee.
It hums quietly in the background while I’m making breakfast.
It shows up uninvited when my phone lights up with a notification.
It creeps in late at night when everyone else is asleep—but my mind isn’t.
And what makes anxiety so tricky is that it doesn’t always look dramatic.
Sometimes it disguises itself as productivity. Or responsibility. Or being “on top of things.”
It looks like replaying conversations before they even happen.
Running mental checklists you never get to cross off.
Carrying the weight of everything—even when nothing is technically wrong.
But underneath it all is that familiar tightness in the chest.
The racing thoughts.
That nagging sense that something is off—even when you can’t quite name what it is.
If this sounds familiar, let me say this clearly: you’re not weak.
You’re human.
Before Loss, My Worries Were Lighter
I’ve been thinking a lot about how different worry feels now compared to before Quintin went to heaven.
Before loss, my worries were lighter.
They still existed—of course they did—but they didn’t carry the same weight.
I worried about schedules, finances, decisions, the normal pressures of life. But deep down, my heart still felt safe. What a priceless feeling… I would do anything to have back!
After loss, worry changed.
Now anxiety doesn’t just ask “What if?”
It whispers, “Remember when?”
Grief teaches your nervous system that life can change in an instant.
And once you’ve lived through the unimaginable, your heart stays on high alert. It scans for danger.
It braces itself. It prepares for impact—even when everything looks calm on the surface.
That’s why anxiety for those walking through grief often hits hardest in the quiet moments. When you wake up. When you try to fall asleep. When your guard finally drops.
But here’s the truth I keep coming back to—one I remind myself of often:
Anxiety is loud, but it is not the authority.
What Anxiety Is Really Doing
Anxiety doesn’t usually come out of nowhere.
It often comes from trying to control outcomes we were never meant to carry.
It’s the mental rehearsal of worst-case scenarios.
The constant scanning for what might go wrong.
Carrying tomorrow’s worries on today’s strength.
Anxiety tells us:
“You need to figure this out right now.”
“If you don’t worry about it, something bad will happen.”
“You’re behind. You’re failing. You’re missing something.”
And if we’re not careful, we start partnering with that voice—confusing worry with wisdom.
But Scripture gives us a very different invitation.
Philippians 4:6–7 says:
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. “
When you begin to recite and pray scripture over your life, it transforms everything! I know it sounds nice…but it actually does.
3 Tangible Tips for When Worry Takes Over
Worry has a way of making everything feel urgent and overwhelming at once. The thoughts blur together, your body tightens, and suddenly it feels impossible to know where to start.
These aren’t “fix-it” steps or quick cures. They’re gentle, practical ways to interrupt worry—especially on days when your mind feels louder than your peace.
1. Untangle the Thought Before You Try to Fix the Feeling
Anxiety is usually driven by tangled thoughts, not just emotions.
Before you try to calm yourself down, pause and ask:
- What am I actually afraid of right now?
- Is this a fact—or a future I’m imagining?
Then name it—out loud or on paper.
For example:
“I’m not anxious about everything. I’m anxious about this one conversation.”
Or:
“I’m not overwhelmed by life—I’m worried about this decision I can’t control.”
Naming the thought pulls it out of the swirl and into the light.
You can’t untangle what you refuse to identify.
Once it’s named, ask yourself:
What is mine to do today—and what am I trying to control that isn’t mine?
That question alone can bring immediate relief, especially when grief or uncertainty has made everything feel heavy.
2. Slow the Body First (Because Worry Lives in the Nervous System)
You cannot think your way out of anxiety if your body is stuck in fight-or-flight.
Start with the physical:
- Take slow, deep breaths (inhale for 4 seconds, exhale for 6)
- Put your feet flat on the floor and ground yourself
- Step outside, stretch, or take a short walk
When your body slows down, your brain follows.
This isn’t a lack of faith—it’s wisdom.
God designed your nervous system, and calming it creates space for peace to return.
Especially after loss or prolonged stress, your body may be reacting before your mind has a chance to catch up. Peace often shows up after we slow our bodies—not before.
3. Exchange Control for Trust—One Small Hand-Off at a Time
Worry grows when we try to carry what was never meant to be ours.
Instead of telling yourself to “stop worrying,” try this:
- Write down one thing you’re anxious about
- Pray it honestly—not polished or put together
- Then release it intentionally
You might say:
“God, I’ve done what I can. I’m handing You the rest.”
This isn’t ignoring reality—it’s choosing where you place the weight.
Philippians 4:6–7 reminds us that peace isn’t something we manufacture.
It’s something we receive after we release.
And sometimes the most faithful thing you can do is stop gripping so tightly.
A Final & VERY IMPORTANT Reminder
Worry doesn’t mean you lack faith.
Often, it simply means you care deeply.
But peace doesn’t come from controlling outcomes—it comes from trusting the One who already holds them.
If worry has been loud lately, be gentle with yourself.
Untangle the thought.
Calm the body.
Release the weight.
You don’t have to carry it all 🤍
& something I often repeat to myself is… I don't know what my future hold, but I know who holds my future. This helps as a mantra when I am feeling that anxiety creep in and take over.
If this spoke to you, let me know in the comments so we can encourage one another. And if someone you love is carrying quiet worry, please share this with them—you never know what God might use it to do. 🤍
I share a bit of my heart this morning below about my grief journey for those of you who want to listen in. Always appreciate a comment below if there is a hardship you are facing and need prayer too. So please feel free to comment below and let us know how you can be supported. I ask that you take a moment and pray for the comment below yours knowing full well when you leave your comment the next one commenting will be doing the same over yours.
Every morning, I wake up and share a bit of my heart on my socials. If you are not following me on instagram, you can do so HERE and in this season specifically I am sharing my grief journey. Praying that I can share hope in the midst of my pain and how you too can find purpose in the midst of your valley by remembering Whose you are and who holds you! For those who would like to take a listen you can do so below.
So thankful for your encouragement each day? Your support means the world to me.
I am excited to announce, I have started my very own Crazy Busy Mama mug collection. Each one of these mugs have my signature exclusive signature on them. You can check them out HERE and you can SNAG IT your favorite like Jesus Loves YOU Here – Each one of my designs comes with my CBM signature with a ✝️ on each. I hope you enjoy having coffee with me each morning and these exclusive CBM designs encourage you to put your best foot forward each day!
Much encouragement and love-
Lori ✝️
*This site contains product affiliate links. We may receive a commission if you make a purchase after clicking on one of these links
